One track mind

I'm up. Fell asleep watching "new moon" and forgot to turn down/off my phone, again. And my sister decided to send me a fb message, which made my phone ding to notify me of my inbox message.

Since I'm up, I've decided to type up a quick entry. No pic. No quote--unless I get some wild hair and decide to throw it in later. Today's entry is brought to you courtesy of one of my patients.

Here it goes...I was working with one of my patients in her room yesterday morning, helping her complete her morning self care routine. We were up at the sink with the curtain pulled, when one of the doctors came in the room with her entourage of short coats. Mind you, these rooms are small enough for two patients, but to cram this group of cornheads into the room was quite ridiculous! The thin curtain giving my patient barely enough visual privacy kept moving as those dorks kept filing in. I was so tempted to jack one of them up through the curtain, but I kinda like my job.

"Can you feel me when I touch you down there?"

My patient and I quickly looked at each other with odd looks on our faces, as if to make sure the other had heard the same words.

"What the heck is she touching down there?," my patient "whispered" as quietly as her dysarthric voice would allow. It was all I could do NOT to start cracking up.

I missed what the doctor had said next, but my patient whispered, "They've got vibrators over there, too!"

Later on, as I heard her retell the story to another therapist, she added, "Yeah, I heard the doctor say, 'tell me when you feel the vibrating stop' and I was like what the fuck...???" I know it was totally inappropriate, but I just couldn't keep from cracking up this time.

Ahhh...sometimes I "go there" courtesy of my patients. It's nice how some people can keep their humor in the midst of a life-altering ordeal.