The Power Of Silent Conversation

I met a friend for coffee this morning. It's one of my favorite things to do. Catching up over a cup of coffee, tea, or whatever else I desire. It can be so relaxing from the stress of the work week.

Sometimes during conversations between individuals there is a pause in the talking. Some people react to this by struggling to say something to break the silence. This silence is sometimes referred to as an awkward pause. Personally, I am comfortable with the silence--just sitting and watching the person or persons. Silent observation. Taking in everything they have to offer. It helps me get a better sense of who they are.

The friend I met this morning once told me he would get nervous and used feel as if he had to say something to fill those awkward pauses. One day he asked me why I would just sit and look at him when the conversation would get quiet. I shared with him the link at the bottom of the page. It's a blog post written about the role of silence in interactions and pretty much explains what I get out of silent conversation. He understands now that the pauses are not from lack of stuff to talk about.

Click the blue link below:

The Power Of Silent Conversation

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Paper Heart

Upon the recommendation of a friend, I rented the movie Paper Heart. It is a quasi documentary in which a young woman (Charlyne Yi) travels the country to find out if real love exists. The awkwardness of the main character is what held my attention throughout the movie. The interviews with the people she encounters offer an insight into individuals' ideas about love...

...wait, I'm not a movie reviewer. I definitely hate reading/hearing other people's review of movies before I see them. That way, I have no expectations. Nothing to taint my mind. I dunno, I would definitely recommend the special features found on the DVD. They were quite hilarious from the songs to the deleted scenes.

I could go on and on about my experiences with lust, love, and heartbreak, but I don't want to bore you with my drama. One thing that has never changed is that my unwillingness to "just settle" precedes all else.

So, as far as true love goes...I'm still looking.

"When you love someone, you love the whole person, just as he or she is, and not as you would like them to be."

~Leo Tolstoy

"Well, Y'all Look Alike"

Okay, I don't even know if I could find a pic that would go along with this story, but it kind of cracks me up every time I replay it in my mind. And maybe anyone reading might not find the humor, but after years of being on the end of racially ignorant comments, I have to add this interaction.

The other day I was walking down the hallway towards my office. I smiled and greeted two of the housekeeping staff who were chatting at a cleaning closet, as I passed by. At the end of the hallway, walking towards me, I saw one of the techs walking towards me with a great big smile on her face. This is how our interaction went as we passed by each other:

Tech: "Let me ask you, do you be knowin' what they be sayin' when they be talkin' their language?"

Me: "What the f-heck did you just say..?"

Tech: (Lauging) "I guess you really don't be understandin' what I be sayin'!"

Sooo...aside from the grammar that totally would have curled my hair had I not put so much product in it, here's the actual funny part of the whole story:

1. I'm third generation Japanese (sansei) in America. The only words I know in Japanese are from the song Mr. Roboto by Styx, and a few other words not usually found in proper Japanese conversation--my fave word being bakatare. (Okay, so I'm fudging a little, I do know more than that, but I thought it would add a little humor.)
2. One of the women at the closet is Korean (primary language Korean, speaks some English--a little broken).
3. The other woman she was talking to is Filipino (I think her primary language is Tagalog, speaks English well, but when with the other Filipino workers, occasionally speaks Tagalog).

...Wait, there's more:

Later that morning, the tech comes walking towards me laughing. With a big grin on her face, she proudly announces her discovery loud enough for everybody to hear, "I know what I was doing this morning--I was talkin' that ebonics!"

Change

Last night it snowed. At the time, I had wanted to go out and take some photos of the freshly falling snow, but it was too cold and too late. Would have been nice to get some photos while it was light outside today, but the first chance I had was this evening after work. The sun had gone down and the wind was blowing. I snapped a few photos, and by a few, I mean five. I wasn't really ready to go in--until after the fifth photo. I had lost my balance and beautifully managed a maneuver to save my camera by twisting my body as I fell. It was so cold out nobody was around to witness my dazzling skills and athleticism. Haha. In reality, I was stunned as I found myself lying on the ground on my back, feet and arms flailing in the air.

The first pic below is the last one I snapped. Plain. It is of some brown, dried up Japanese Blood Grass sticking out of the snow. While taking the photo, somewhere in my head popped an image of strong blades of grass radiating the beautiful colors of fall in the light of the sun. A photograph. I had to find it. Scanning through the numerous uploaded pics in my iPhoto library (yay to the digital era), I finally found the photo of the image that was burned into my memory--taken on a beautiful fall day.

"Autumn to winter, winter into spring,

Spring into summer, summer into fall,--

So rolls the changing year, and so we change;

Motion so swift, we know not that we move.

~Dinah Maria Mulock

I look forward to spring, when the first green blades of grass begin to peek through the ground, continuing the cycle. Until then, I will enjoy winter and all it has to offer.

"Everything changes, nothing remains without change."

~ Siddhārtha Gautama

A Note To Alessia

"You haven't updated your blog in a while..." A comment found in a message from one of my friends today. I smiled. Reading these words, thinking to myself that I could have sworn I posted the yesterday, if not the day before. I checked my blog. Nope. Somehow when you're busy time seems to escape. Busy, is totally a matter of perception. Some people are good at multitasking, some people feel they can only handle one thing at a time--and some multitaskers should probably only handle one thing at a time.

As for this blog, some days making entries is so effortless, some days it is draining. Because my entries/thoughts are centered around a photo or two, it is difficult to make an entry if I have not been using my camera. Which is why it's been several days since my last entry. I keep trying to think of a photo to use.

I need my inspiration.

Looking at today's photo, while making this entry in the quietness of the house, I get a sense of peace and the beauty of nature. The only obvious thing noting the presence of mankind is the rippling of the waves towards the shoreline...

Distractions. My peripheral vision spies the snow falling outside the windows of my house, which adds to the beauty. My thoughts change to ideas about my next entry and the possibilities of blog entries I could make after taking wonderful photos of the snow.

FOCUS. Oh yeah, the reason I chose the photo. Although feelings of peacefulness arise when I look at this photo, there is also a reminder of change--for off in the distance lie glaciers that are receding from the water's edge. A sign of human presence and global warming. With that thought brought to the front of my mind, the feeling of peacefulness that I had experienced when initially looking at the photograph is tainted.

Perception.

On that note, if you're looking for something always to bring a laugh, go visit http://stuffjoesays.blogspot.com/

What's in a name?

Since I'm in a Japanesie (is that a word?) mode, just thought I'd post a picture of my name in Japanese.

It is written in Kanji. This is only one of several ways to write my name. I don't have any examples of the other ways, though. Each symbol has a meaning. I don't know what the top symbol is, but I do have a picture of the bottom symbol with the meaning below it.

Yeah, I kinda get a chuckle out of the meaning of the symbol, too...

2010

AKEMASHITE OMEDETO GOZAIMASU

❀HAPPY NEW YEAR❀

❤

I should have spent the weeks prior to Omikosa (the day of New Year's Eve) cleaning the house. This is done to get rid of the dirt from the passing year and to welcome the New Year with a fresh and peaceful mind. Unfortunately, most of December was spent in the chaos of work, spending too many hours pulled in various directions, trying get the processes down for a smooth transition of the joint venture into the New Year. This left me totally exhausted, which I think set me up for a nasty cold to close the season. It is this cold that has blown away my nights, leaving me with barely enough energy to pass through dinner, on to an unavoidable nap, and then lying awake in bed from the hours of eleven to about three in the morning.

New Year's morning used to be a tradition in my family. Gathering and eating Ozoni for breakfast and then making sushi for a family open house. The family open house was a hit with all of my parents' friends. People would even call if they didn't get an invitation to see, if by chance, their invitation got lost in the mail or whether my parents were even having an open house. Thus, my parents were never able to decrease the size of the gathering of well-wishers, which would leave my whole family totally exhausted from cooking, cleaning, and serving the whole afternoon into the darkness of the night. People would even brave the ice storms or deep snowfall for a meal. Since my father died in 2005, the tradition slowly grew smaller, with just family and a few close friends coming over. With my mother being sick from her cancer, there was no New Year's party of 2009.

This year, with just me being in the house, barely a notice that the New Year has arrived, for the house is a mess, and I had to work this morning, leaving me with no desire to do more than defrost some frozen chili for dinner.

One thing that I did muster enough energy to do after work on this freezing day, was to go to the art museum to see an exhibit titled Five Centuries of Japanese Screens, which is about to close in a couple of days after a three month run. Amazingy huge screens (byobu) hand painted with various scenes filled a few showrooms. I definitely enjoyed the pre-modern displays, but not as fond of the contemporary art pieces in the exhibit. Wandering through the small rooms, although spotted with other people viewing, left me with a kind of a serene peaceful feeling. Enough to forget about the cold of the outside--until I actually took a step out of the building to go home.

In the photo below, is a screen that has hung on the living room wall of the house in which I was raised, and now am currently living. Never a thought went through my mind to ever really look at it, but I thought it would be a perfect photo to include with this entry. No quote for the photo. Just wishes for happiness and good health throughout the New Year.