The Power Of Silent Conversation

I met a friend for coffee this morning. It's one of my favorite things to do. Catching up over a cup of coffee, tea, or whatever else I desire. It can be so relaxing from the stress of the work week.

Sometimes during conversations between individuals there is a pause in the talking. Some people react to this by struggling to say something to break the silence. This silence is sometimes referred to as an awkward pause. Personally, I am comfortable with the silence--just sitting and watching the person or persons. Silent observation. Taking in everything they have to offer. It helps me get a better sense of who they are.

The friend I met this morning once told me he would get nervous and used feel as if he had to say something to fill those awkward pauses. One day he asked me why I would just sit and look at him when the conversation would get quiet. I shared with him the link at the bottom of the page. It's a blog post written about the role of silence in interactions and pretty much explains what I get out of silent conversation. He understands now that the pauses are not from lack of stuff to talk about.

Click the blue link below:

The Power Of Silent Conversation

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TOS

TOS, been thinking about you this evening. Wish I could reach through this computer screen and give you a great big hug. I know I say it in a joking manner, but I do appreciate you. I admire you, and I am glad that you are my friend. Or at least I hope we are friends :) 

You are very encouraging and supportive. I have learned so much from you. 

I think  you're right that we just need to go away to a place far from everything. Relax. You can take your H2O colors, books, and whatever. Me, I'll take my snacks, music, and more snacks. (Because we all know from my last entry that books would only take up space in my suitcase.)

I've chosen several places to go...

"Sometimes it seems your ever-increasing list of things to do can leave you feeling totally undone."

 - Susan Mitchell and Catherine Christie, I'd Kill for a Cookie

(Lugano, Switzerland)

"A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking." 

- Earl Wilson

( Windward Side - Oahu, Hawaii)

"Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and  proportion is more readily seen." 

-Leonardo Da Vinci

(Vinci, Italy)

...I'm ready when you are!

Spring in Winter

It was a beautiful sunny day today. I could have sworn it was spring. Hard to believe that it is still winter. This is just a tease because the weather forecast is calling for colder weather by this weekend. Guess I chose a good day to take off from work and spend time with old friends. After I spent the morning exercising with a friend, I rushed to meet another for lunch. After lunch, we decided to go to the park because the weather was so nice.

"Do you want to walk or sit?" he asked.

"Walk," I replied - afraid I wouldn't know how to handle the awkward silence I knew would ensue. Most of the time I welcome silences, but this was an old friend that I've just recently been talking to again. Wondered if we still had enough in common to still be friends.

We walked and talked. Discussing our separate lives. Yes, there were silences. Not so awkward, as I had feared. Appropriate silences. Silences made as if to take a break from conversation to absorb the scenery on this beautiful day. Before I knew it, we had walked around the park three times. I stopped to stretch my calves. 

"Do you want to walk some more?" he asked.

"Sit, I want to sit..." I was tired because prior to meeting him for lunch, I had already completed a three and a half mile hilly walk.

"Why didn't you say so earlier?" he asked.

"I wanted to walk," I replied.

We sat and talked some more. Before I knew it, two hours had elapsed. We began walking back to our cars. His hand brushed mine, accidentally. The next thing I knew, we were two friends holding hands walking back to our cars. In silence. It was a comforting feeling. We hugged and got into our cars and drove our separate ways. A nice ending to a beautiful afternoon.

Another Birthday

Nope, it's not my birthday. It's the birthday of one of my friends. Although I don't get to see her often or talk to her much, I will always remember the first time I met her. She told me she never received my resumé from HR. She hired me anyway. I'm sure she rued the day. I always gave her trouble. One time I gave her a note from "my god" that said that I couldn't work on Sundays. After that, when the weekend schedules came out, I was always signed up to work on a Sunday. I think that was her way of getting me back. 

I still work at the same job, but my friend has moved on. Occasionally we meet for dinner with my new boss. It's always fun catching up at those dinners. So, I'm looking forward to dinner at the end of the week...wherever it's going to be.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! A toast to the woman who showed me that it is okay to wear two different colored shoes to work, laugh so the whole world can hear you,  and say "note taken."  I hope you have a great day. 

"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream"

- C.S. Lewis

Knock-Knock

I saw this door knocker and thought it was pretty cool. Whenever I look at the photograph for this post, I think about knock-knock jokes. Here's the one running through my head right now:

Would you forget me in an hour?

No.

Would you forget me in a day?

No.

Would you forget me in a month?

No.

Would you forget me in a year?

No.

Would you forget me in ten years?

No.

Would you forget me in fifty years?

No.

Knock-knock.

Who's there?

I thought you said you wouldn't forget me...

"When you remember me, it means that you have carried something of who I am with you, that I have left some mark of who I am on who you are. It means that you can summon me back to your mind even though countless years and miles may stand between us. It means that if we meet again, you will know me. It means that even after I die, you can still see my face and hear my voice and speak to me in your heart. 

For as long as you remember me, I am never entirely lost. When I'm feeling most ghost-like, it is your remembering me that helps remind me that I actually exist. When I'm feeling sad, it's my consolation. When I'm feeling happy, it's part of why I feel that way.

If you forget me, one of the ways I remember who I am will be gone. If you forget, part of who I am will be gone." - Frederick Buechner

"Be sure to put the knocker fairly low on your door in case a very small friend drops by." 

- A.A. Milne

Dinner

Went to dinner tonight at a friend's house. I wanted to thank her for making such a lovely meal. So, here's to good friends, good food, good conversation. And then lazing on the red sofa after dinner, once again!

"One of the delights of life is eating with friends, second to that is talking about eating. And, for an unsurpassed double whammy, there is talking about eating while you are eating with friends." - Laurie Colwin

Breaking in the fine china!

Stuffed pork loin, mushroom risotto, and a nice bottle of wine.

And she even made dessert! Chocolate mousse.

JUGs

I just got home from spending the evening with a group of friends. (JUGs, or Just Us Gals.) I think the original purpose of this group was to plan activities and hang out together once a month. Which pretty much fell apart after the first few months. It's been eons since we all got together, and some new people have joined the group. It was fun hearing all the stories. I'm looking forward to our next "meeting," which is going to take place in another eon. I'm sure it will be nice catching up, once again. 

The flower in the photograph below was so small, I almost missed it. It was taken one summer on Coconut Island in Hawaii. I wish I had a landmark so that you could see how small the flower was. I'd say it was about the size of my pinky fingernail. Luckily, I am always on the lookout for something to photograph and I spied it on the ground. So, being the dork that I am, I got down on my hands and knees to photograph the flower. Then, I had to run to catch up with the rest of the group.

Nobody sees a flower - really - it is so small - we haven't the time - and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time. - Georgia O'Keeffe 

Happy Birthday

Here's a shout out birthday wish to MDM, who I've been friends with for 23 years. I raise my glass of Italian Moscato for a toast to you (I've upgraded from peach schnapps). May this year (and many years to come) bring you much happiness. Mess, I'm thrilled that you're back. 

Happy Birthday, my friend...I've missed you so. 

xoxo

Byodo-In

Accompanying today's photograph I'm sending a thank you for one of my gangsta friends who surprised me by making dinner for me and my family last night. The kitchen is out of commission because of a total rehab job and I've been getting sick and tired of trying to creatively make healthy meals. RKS, the food was delicious and extremely appreciated.

Thank you so much...my for realio friend...

Remember the building in the photograph? I shot it when we went to Hawaii. It's the Byodo-In Buddhist temple located in the Valley of the Temples on Oahu, Hawaii. It is a replica of the original 900 year old Byodo-In temple located in Uji, Japan.

The F word

Today's photograph/post is for a very dear friend (and you know who you are). Your performance tonight was wonderful and you looked beautiful as always. You truly are an amazing and talented person and I am honored to be able to call you friend. You rock. Smile...

xoxo,
me

Regarding the photograph, it was shot the day before my birthday in 2008 at Cascine Rossi (a family member's country home) in Casale Monferrato, Italy...after which the local police stopped us--I think he thought we were casing the joint.